you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
its not stalking. its research.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
