East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
