we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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