I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Princesses don't give blow jobs
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
