The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
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