Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize
