If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
