This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
