What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
