Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
this boner is exhausting
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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