I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
Randomize
