As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Randomize
