Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
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