i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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