his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Randomize