what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Randomize