in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Randomize
