Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
