I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Randomize
