Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
I did not marry a roomba.
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