My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Randomize