is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
