so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
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