we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Randomize
