i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
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