haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
