Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
either way he was missing a nipple.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
