Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize