All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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