This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize
