I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Randomize