but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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