that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
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