Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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