I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Randomize
