had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
you will always have a special place in my vag
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
And then he peed in my hair
Randomize
