i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
