He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
