what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
it was like his penis was on wheels.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
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