i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
my shit smells like andre
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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