i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
