You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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