That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I supernannyed him into submission
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
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