If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize