Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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