i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
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