I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Randomize
