it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Randomize
