Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
