So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
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